Entry #11: Giving up all the pretention

I can't hold it anymore. I want to talk to her. I want to call her and I'm gonna call her right now. I don't know what I would say to her but still. I know she's happy now and all but hearing her voice, that simple 'hello' was enough to lift my spirit. I don't know why but she can't hear me. Maybe something's wrong with the phone. I'll just send her an email instead. Am I hoping for a reply? Of course! Will it happen? Highly unlikely. My mind is fucked up right now and I can't think clearly JM de guzman levels. Shit, this is bad.